My soul is tired

If this was a tunnel, I certainly can’t see the light at the end of it. I feel stuck and helpless. I can’t wait for this – whatever this is – to be over.


I tried….

Colleen Cabili


Graduate of Communication Arts

+63 926 674 3469,


To secure an entry level position in an industry where I can practice and at the same time hone my skills.


Date of Birth: March 1, 1995

Nationality: Filipino

Address: Novaliches, Quezon City


University of the Philippines Los Banos (2011-2016)

BA Communication Arts Major in Speech Communication


President, The UPLB Com Arts Society (May 2015- May 2016)

Marketing Committee Head,K’Na, the Dreamweaver (August 2015-September 2015)

Logistics Committee Head, Tsinelas Musikal (January 2015-May-2015)

Program Committee Head, Art and Soul VII: Pintig, Piyesa, Pinsel (August 2014-September 2014)

Sponsorship Committee Member, Prewreck 2: Retake the Mental Breakdown (June 2014-September 2014)

Assistant Stage Manager, Bonifacio and the Freak Show (November 2013-February 2014)

Production Manager, Haranang Bayan (July 2013-December 2013)

Marketing Committee Member, Harmonya’s Sini-La-Ngan (January 2013-March 2013)


Angelica Dayao +63 905 212 9043

Instructor, University of the Philippines Los Banos

Musical Director, Harmonya: The String Ensemble of UPLB

Janette Silva +63 925 8474843

Assistant Professor, University of the Philippines Los Banos

Moses Villanueva +63 917 808 2642

Instructor, University of the Philippines Los Banos

Junior Adviser, The UPLB Com Arts Society


Week 2: S&R Pizza > IT 1 (Sorry, Sir!)

Not really sure if this counts as an IT 1 post because I didn’t even attend this week’s lab class (lol). I feel like I need to explain myself because I didn’t really mean to skip class that day. :((( So Feb 4 was also the day of our organization’s first major event for this semester, PreWreck 3.0. Prep time was really crucial since we were expecting 800-1,000 partygoers eager to get their money’s worth of sick beats and unli booze. I’ll get to the specifics once I gather enough motivation to blog about the event. Let’s just hope it happens soon. So anyway the whole time that we were in S&R to buy freakin’ red cups, I was texting one of my classmates for updates. By this time I have already accepted the fact that there is no way that I can make it back to LB 45 minutes before 1, so my orgmates and I just settled on a vacant table and ordered lunch. I was in the middle of eating my combo pizza (aka. oily piece of heaven in the middle of consumerist hell) when Donn told me that a quiz was given to the class. I didn’t want to miss it, okay. 😦 And he said that the lesson had something to do with Math. *cue Amy Schumer’s  “noooooo~”*

Ah well.

Week 1: Of Puppy Videos and Free Operating Systems

So as mentioned in the previous post, I’ll start publishing IT 1-related posts since our lab instructor made it a class requirement. To start with, I’m pretty sure last Thursday was pretty much how all my Thursdays would go this semester. After a damn good grind at the gym and a sumptuous lunch of Beef Bibimbap at my go-to Korean restaurant in LB, I basically skipped my way to IT 1 lab class, my first class for the day. I walked in not expecting to do much for that day’s meeting since our instructor promised us beforehand that he was pretty chill. I also remembered my computer teacher in elementary telling me that my html coding skills are flawless so that also contributed to my stellar mood that afternoon. So basically, the whole time all I did was watch videos of stumbling puppies and drifting Ford Fiestas and transfer files from Desktop to folder without dragging and right-clicking, which was pretty productive if you ask me. I’ve never been so grateful of mastering the art of keeping an eye on multiple tabs all at once. Being the shallow person that I am, I found the Ubuntu OS pretty ~cool~ because it looked different from the Windows OS. The color scheme reminded me of Alienware laptops, which is weird because I don’t think the OS is for gaming?? I don’t know… Anyway, speaking of games, I have to feed my cats. Whoop.

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This cat, specifically.

Semi-Hiatus Happenings

Hellooo. It’s been a while since my last post, mainly because I’ve been quite busy with life inside UPLB. I haven’t even followed through with my year-end post! LOL. Since my last update, Chao and I blew a lot of cash for Vinnie’s birthday celebration in LB, I’ve prerog-ed my way to 15 more units, survived two meetings of ROTC, tried my hardest to squeeze in a bit of gym time, and basically did everything that I can to ensure that I can graduate this June–except for one thing: talk to Ma’am Abello. *cue suspense music* I am REALLY SERIOUSLY NOT looking forward to talking to her, but what the heck. It has to be done. I’d probably do it this Feb.

Sooo, yeah. I don’t really have much to say, except that I have a few tan lines now thanks to 2 hours of marching under the sun earlier today and that I bought new goggles and can’t wait to start learning how not to drown in PE class. And and and Chao also sponsored my leggings haul for this month and OH MY HOLY MOTHER OF ATHLETIC WEAR they are so beautifuuuuuuuuul ❤ I’m a lucky girl ❤ ❤ ❤ I have leggings with pockets!!! Do you guys even realize how ~GENIUS~ that is??!! ❤ ❤ ❤ Now I’m more inspired to do deadz and skwatzz and hopefully more bench presses and oly lifts. 2016 goals, yo! Well obviously I won’t be able to fulfill the first item in my mountain bucket list since January ends tomorrow. Prolly gonna climb Mt. Kalisungan on Feb instead. Hihi. Anyway, it’s just the second week of classes but the academic load that I have to finish this weekend is already a shit-ton. Our IT 1 lab prof (who happens to be a batchmate </3) also required us to do blog posts related to lab class so expect regular updates soon. As in tomorrow kind of soon, since he gave us a deadline. Stay strong, self. Stay strong. As for the year-end post, I’ll get back to that soon enough. Maybe next week. Or next month. :))

For this coming week I have a couple of group reports coming up, a major event (YO, PREWRECK), and maybe an overdue interview with a thesis subject. Probably a good idea to get back on those.


I vividly remember including “join a fitness-related competition” in my bucket list. It also helps that said list is one of my first posts so I get to see it first thing when I open the blog. So this afternoon, I went to the gym later than usual because I got too engrossed surfing the internet (no surprise there). I was also more awkward than usual since just last night I was added to the gym dudes’ FB chat group and believe me, there were some things there that my womanly eyes weren’t supposed to see. Anyway, as I alternated with this guy (Dale, I think) at the squat rack, the dude on the preacher curl set-up chatted me up–

Person: Anak ka ba ni so and so, ano apelyido, nagcocompete ba siya blah blah

Me: Blah blah Cabili po blah blah dati po

P: Ikaw nagcocompete ka?

Me: Plano ko po sana… *shrugs and prepared to get back under the bar*

P: Ah kung gusto mo magcompete meron sa December, ‘yung Mutant. Magsabi ka lang sa mga nandun sa harap, ako magrerepresent sa ‘yo.

Me: Ah… *tries to absorb everything while keeping my smile plastered on my clueless face*

P: Ako nga pala may-ari nitong gym. 

Me: Ay talaga po ba? Sige po thank you po!

And just like that, I have a sponsor. But waaaaait, it gets better.

Me: *just killed my 5th set and now trying to stay alive*

Kuya Donnie: Pinapabigay pala ni boss *hands over a card which I thought was a calling card but ohholymolymotherofallgods it says VIP in front*

KD: Ipapakita mo lang ‘yan sa mga branches nitong gym tapos pwede ka na magworkout. Nasabihan na din sila sa harap. 

Me: *stares like a complete loony* Woooooow

Awesome stuff really do happen when you least expect it, huh. Good thing I decided to laze around before dragging my sloth ass to the gym after all. Another reason to kick ass at the gym!

Thanks, Sir Ariel! Team Xtreme FTW!




Rest Day

I hope my right wrist feels better soon. Last Sunday, I might have gone overboard with a few upper body exercises which caused aggravation on my already injured wrist. I ended up icing it when I got home because rotating it hurts. It’s an on and off kind of pain so I headed straight to Toby’s Sports before going back home this afternoon to buy a wrist support. I haven’t been out of the gym for two days straight and although it causes me *cue tears* emotional pain to be away from it for a period of time, I know that it will do me good eventually.

2016 Bucket List

No one follows through with their New Year’s resolution. Who ya kiddin’? Bucket lists, in my opinion, are way more tangible and easier to fulfill. Here you go.

  • Climb mountains!

I actually created a specific list for this one.

January- Mt. Kalisungan (Calauan, Laguna)

March – Mt. Hapunang Banoi (Rodriguez, Rizal)

April – Mt. Maculot (Cuenca, Batangas)

July – Mt. Daraitan + side trip to Tinipak River and Pililla Windmills (Tanay, Rizal)

August – Mt. Daguldol (Lobo, Batangas)

September – Mt. Marami (Maragondon, Cavite)

November – Pico de Loro (Maragondon, Cavite)

  • Visit museums and art galleries (Metropolitan Museum and Pinto Art Gallery, I got my eyes on you)
  • Go to Avilon Zoo
  • Learn a new hobby (Paper cutting and calligraphy, perhaps? 🙂)
  • Learn how to ride a bike
  • Learn how to swim (properly!! I always look like I’m drowning hahaha)
  • Learn how to drive a car
  • Invest in the stock market
  • Join a fitness-related competition 🙂

Let’s go, self!


2NE15 (part I)

“Always believe that something wonderful is about to happen.”

In less than 4 hours, we’ll be bidding 2015 adieu. I planned on creating a post solely for reflecting on everything that happened this year–thank goodness for Chao for giving me a planner!–and as I looked back on my entries, I can’t help but feel a bit emotional. So much has happened this year. Luckily, I survived. I’ll be doing this post in two parts because chef duties + reflection feels + no to lengthy posts


I started to take fitness seriously in December 2014. Even though I only worked out at home, I made sure that I didn’t half ass all my routines. Come January, I juggled exercise time with RareJob. I encountered different kinds of people–professionals, retirees, children, high school students, etc. Anyway, I had abs this month. Not the kind that’ll merit a #fitspo picture but I was pretty damn proud nevertheless. Also, the Pope came to visit and it was all kinds of overwhelming even though I only saw him on TV. I may not be as religious as I was before, but that old man did have an effect on me.


During CKI’s tree-planting activity in San Pablo


My February in one word: Chao

Due to the academic calendar shift, this year’s Feb Fair was stress-free from acads. Valentine’s Day fell on a Saturday, and it was Chao and I’s first. He surprised me with a bouquet of chocolates and we headed to Mio Cocina for an afternoon date. He owned the stage during their Feb Fair performance and it was my first time to receive a shoutout from a “celebrity”. :)) It’s also worth mentioning that I spent fair week with a busted knee after falling from excitement during our GA.

feb 1

Ramen for Valentines


Feb Fair!


My birthday month! Aside from the Cagbalete trip, what made my birthday extra special was Chao’s poor (but genuine) attempt at surprising me. Too bad I didn’t take a photo of his apartment. 😦 This month also marked my first year in the Society.


1/2 of TravelCom


Cagbalete buddies!

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Eximius turns 1


This sums it all up:apr


This has been the most challenging month this year. I lost a lot of sleep and tears and felt like giving up all the things that mattered. I was always at the point of exhaustion which greatly affected my physical and mental health, as well as my academics. However, there are still a few highlights that are worth noting. Our belly dancing recital and Chao’s birthday made this month worthwhile. Sometime this month, I also told my parents about Chao’s existence.


Group 2 ❤


My mommy came home on June 11. Two days after her arrival, I had my hair cut REALLY short. I’m pretty sure it looked weird, but everyone was too nice to say so. To euphemize the fact, Chao said I look like a boy from behind. We also had dinner with my parents, and I had to keep reminding him not to call me babe in front of them. :)) After the stress brought by May, I was on and off with my attendance in the gym. A mini-accident (100lb bar rolled its way to the nape of my neck( put me off of it for the whole of midyear classes. Chao and I faced Math 14 for the second time in our college lives.



to be continued…

One-way Ticket

The Sunday after Christmas, Eka, Eu, and I went to Letran to visit our 1st year high school adviser’s wake. Until now, I still find it hard to believe that she’s already gone. I am unable to accept that someone so full of hope and life is now gone, just like that. I found it hard to take my eyes off of her, at some point I believed that she would actually open her eyes and tell us that it’s all just a joke. I tried to memorize her every feature–I stared hard. Really hard. She really looked different from behind the glass. I wanted to scold those who fixed her for not doing a damn good job on my teacher. Her baby hair was all over her face, her cheeks seemed too stuffed, her dress was off, her makeup was caking–I focused on the tiniest details just to keep my mind off the truth. She’s gone for good. Her one-way ticket came much too soon.